That’s One Way to See It

written by Preston True - 1 Comment

• You walk into a retail store on a Monday morning in February and the store clerk says, “Pretty cold out there, eh?”
• A work colleague sends you an email sharing words about the promotion of another colleague.
• You create a plan for sales growth that exceeds all past sales projections and results by 75%.

What does each one of these three scenarios have in common?

If you guessed that each has something to do with you, then you win!  But that’s not where I’m looking.

The common thread of each of these scenarios is that none of them have an opinion or interpretation attached to it.  In all instances, there is nothing but facts.

So what’s the point?  I’m curious about what opinions and interpretations you’re experiencing right now in reading this.  Are you frustrated?  Are you hoping that I actually make a good point?  Are you sensing you’ll be really bored with my musings?

Exactly.

You see, we all exist in a world of interpretations.  Whether we walk into a retail store, get an email from a colleague or make plans for the future, we rarely experience any of those activities without assigning meaning to them.  What’s it mean that the store clerk said what he did?  What’s my work colleague really trying to say?  How am I going to achieve these new sales goals in the current economy?

No matter how long you or I replay these examples, we’ll end up assigning some type of meaning to them.  Why do we do this?  Because as emotional creatures, we strive to have everything mean something or align with a value system to keep order in our lives. 

Ask yourself the following question, “What’s the meaning of life?”  If you’re like 99% of folks, you’ll come up with an answer to that question, no matter what it is.  Whatever your answer, you’ve assigned the answer meaning.  Meaning that fits into your version of how things should or shouldn’t go or be.

Just to be sure, there’s nothing wrong with this process.  We live successful and fruitful lives by leveraging this process.

However, consider that although it serves us many times, when it doesn’t serve us, it does some real damage.  Here’s an example:

An insurance agent had to let a salesperson go last week.  The agency has clear expectations of performance and the salesperson wasn’t meeting the expectations.  However, when the agency owner called the salesperson into her office, the salesperson put up a huge fight.  “You’re firing me because you don’t like me.  I’ve seen you with the other folks all nice and such.”  Whether that was the case or not, the salesperson disrupted the entire office for most of the afternoon because he made his lack of performance MEAN that the agency owner didn’t like him.

The salesperson felt “snubbed”.  Or at least that’s the interpretation he created.

So what action do you think this salesperson is taking now?  Is he seeking another opportunity or trying to “right” the perceived “wrong” by complaining and threatening to sue his former employer?

If you guessed the second, you win again!

More often or not, your actions are a direct reflection of your interpretations or the meaning you assign things; empowering or disempowering.  The trick is not to stop creating interpretations, but to become more aware that you’re doing what we all have been programmed to do – create interpretations.

Since we create disempowering interpretations, it means we can create empowering ones as well.  So when you go to take your next action on a project, sales goal or in a relationship, first check to see what your interpretations are of the current state of affairs.  That check-in may prove very empowering.

Leadership Practices:

1. There’s nothing to “fix” about creating interpretations.  That would be like trying to fix how your brainwaves operate – good luck.  Rather, practice being more aware of where, when and how you act based on interpretations.  The more aware you can become, the more you’ll be at choice rather than being a prisoner of undistinguished behavior.
2. When you do get hooked (upset) by an interpretation, look to where this interpretation likely originated… in your past somewhere.  In our example above, our salesperson was getting hooked by a past experience of being told he wasn’t good enough.  Being let go from the insurance agency had nothing to do with that past experience, but his interpretations made the connection.
3. When things don’t go the way you want them to, take a moment to ask “What actually did happen?”  In other words, distinguish the facts from the interpretation.  Many times, this is all that’s required to create a new set of actions that move you in the right direction.

Happy Meaning-Making,

-Coach Preston